Tag: grief

sunyata: surrender, release, and engagement

I had other plans for what I wanted to write this today- well, last week, or at all, really. That’s how things go, sometimes. In the last few months, two members of my knitting/ disabled community have died, and rather suddenly, too, at that. It’s strange, how those two communities cross over, I suppose, but that’s not what I wanted to…

in which I am a day too late, but really, let’s just get back to it already

Kiddo is home in Baltimore again and we have begun trying to return to our normal daily lives, too. I’ve spent the last month running up and down the East Coast, which has had me thinking a lot about travel, space, and especially this country; how we are built of regions, all of these spaces and cultures which are can…

this past month, as a brief playlist

There’s nothing I can say about the month of June except that we are through it. I can’t say that I am particularly happy that we are, but I am glad to see July, with its heat and showy national holiday; it’s a distracting, cleansing, just- over- the- mid- point bit of the year that at least allows me the…

in which there are small comforts

Despite keeping ties to New England over the years, I think I’d forgotten just how beautiful the summers here are. I’ve been double- checking with friends over the last week, just to reassure Sam (and myself) that it really is going to keep being this good. Folks who’ve grown up here and stayed tend to meet these questions with a…

we all know which side we’re on

In truth, I haven’t felt terribly inspired this week. I’ve felt sad, and nostalgic, angry, and a little frightened. Mostly sad. I have spent the week thinking about some of the places that shaped me in my twenties- the Rainbow Room (which closed so long ago they don’t even have a page, damnit), the Lighthouse, my stray nights at the…

in which we are missing a small but significant friend

Emma left us suddenly this Sunday night. Sam and I came home from a late lunch with friends and she was panting like a dog, laying on her side on the kitchen floor, Barrett curled up beside her. Kiddo had texted us when we were on our way home to say she was worried, and we knew as soon as…

on conservation, emotion, and sitting with it all

Man, sometimes it’s hard to do the right things. I work really hard at energy conservation. That’s a funny sentence right there: “I work really hard at energy conservation.” A total oxymoron if there ever was one, but anyone who’s been ill for any extended period- ever have mono?- you know what I mean. You have to save up for…

on grief & the work of hands

When something horrible happens, it is natural to feel helpless. Stopped. Frozen. There’s no procedure for dealing with something horrific, no checklist for coping with a tragedy. We become locked in shock and grief. I find myself restless in the face of horrible things, full of purposeless movement. I fidget, fret, pace: I need a place for all of this…